17 May 2021 — WHEN DID WE STOP BEING WHO WE INNATELY ARE AND TAKE ON BOARD OTHERS’ OPINIONS OF HOW WE SHOULD BE?

I share a house with someone who is NOT fixated on everything having a place and everything being in its place. Every day I wish I could be more like this person and not be so hung up on everywhere being clean and tidy. And yet I find it very difficult to live in an untidy space.

This need I have to live in tidy surroundings was fostered by my upbringing: conditioned into me by my parents. The ‘me’ I am today tells myself that when things are tidy the energy is better and therefore I am more in touch with my ‘intuitive, soul’ energy. And perhaps this is so, BUT, being paranoid, as I feel I am, is very much a facet of the Ego Mind rather than the Soul Mind and it strengthens my belief that even in my advanced years I am still trying to be a ‘good girl’ and live up to my Mother’s expectations of how I SHOULD BE.

It is important, I feel, that I accept the way I am and remember the saying by the Greek Poet Hesiod — ‘Observe the measure, MODERATION is best in ALL THINGS’.

AND, perhaps one day TRUE BEING will be the order of the day, when I connect to WHO I INNATELY AM, and stop DOING WHAT I FEEL I OUGHT TO DO and stop BEING WHO I FEEL OTHERS WANT ME TO BE. In other words, when I act from MY HEART rather than MY MIND.